Five mistakes you are likely to make as an expat, while searching for a job

1. Investing too much time and energy in volunteer activities – Learn to select

With two or three exceptions, the vast majority of the volunteer activities I have been involved in, were centred around editing and writing. On one of those occasions I  conducted a mini-research because I found the topic extremely interesting and challenging. However, after sending my article, which took about two weeks to be finished and quite a lot of work, the person who initially  asked me to write on that particular area was no longer showing proper interest in my work. The lesson I learned was that I need to detach myself from people who are unable to appreciate my efforts. It is time consuming and useless.

Volunteer activities are excellent means of trying out yourself, of experimenting in new areas that you don’t necessarily feel confident in. You might end up surprising yourself,  because engaging in unusual challenges can bring up skills that you never thought you possessed. But you need to carry on doing volunteer activities only for those organizations that can truly appreciate your time and effort. The person who was unable to value my involvement, inevitably did me a favour. Imagine what it would have been like to work for someone who showed no respect for me while  I was working as a volunteer. It says a lot about the person in particular and about the work philosophy of that firm, in general. 

However tempting a position might seem to you, before aiming for a certain enrolment, be careful and aware of the type of people you are going to surround yourself with. Who you talk to is who you become, eventually.

2. Assuming that English is a universal language – It’s not (or not equally universal, anyway) unless you are a native speaker

This is the most common mistake I see among many expats and I can see my earlier self in many of them. When I first got here, I automatically assumed that with English I will be able to find a job, on the spot. Well, little did I know that besides an excruciatingly competitive job market, one of the most important conditions in order to ‘penetrate’ into the system is to be at least a native speaker, when it comes to teaching English. I will not get into details whether it is fair or unfair. Most of the job advertisements for teaching staff start with the assumption that you are a NATIVE speaker, full stop. So you need to cope with that.

Learning the language of the community is essential and if you can manage to pick up the dialect as well, then all the better for you, because it definitely enhances your chances to find a job. But to put it plainly, you have no idea how necessary, it not lifesaving  the ability to master the local language can turn out to be. In extreme and life threatening situations, people instinctively use their native language, it is absolutely natural.

A couple of years ago, on a weekend we were walking on the streets and at a certain moment a car got out of control on a road that was crossing our path, rolling down from a hillside. As usually during our walks, I was completely absorbed by the scenery,  while holding my daughter’s hand, when suddenly a man shouted ‘Achtung!’ then’ Vorsicht!’ again and again, because I did not react to his first desperate cries. He was running after his car, which was speeding towards us, only a couple of meters away. If I hadn’t been able to grasp his words, the consequences would have been fatal. I almost tore my daughter’s arm out as I sprang her in the air to get us away from the car. Those words and a minimal language knowledge saved us.

On a more cheerful note, I have to add that not being able to understand the local language properly leads not only to an inherent feeling of insecurity but you are likely to be missing out on really fun moments. Yesterday, after work I took the long forgotten and broken hairdryer to the electrical tram, to recycle it. I took it from my bag and approached the person is charge of picking up the electrical devices. In the meantime I noticed a bald middle-aged man smiling at me. He stood outside the queue and probably was waiting for someone. As I looked at him, he asked me in Swiss German if I was really thinking about giving away that hairdryer to recycling, because he was looking for something similar and then he just pointed at his bald head. ( the cable of the hairdryer had been cut off, as my husband is very handy with reusing these stuff, so my poor hairdryer definitely looked more than functional…). Since I was in a good mood I decided to play along the bald man’s game, so I asked him in return, in High German “ Are you sure you need this hairdryer, because if you do, first you need to comb your hair and only then you can dry it…’ It was a moment of genuine fun, but only because I managed to grasp the bald man’s message, although my Swiss German is pretty basic. I had a good laugh, he had a good laugh and the man in charge at the tram had a good laugh too. My point is that we all laughed as accomplices in a humorous situation, while there was a sense of inclusion. Otherwise it would have been a bit awkward, him smiling at me, me not comprehending what he said, the man picking up the devices laughing as well and finally me, feeling a bit embarrassed. It is never too late to learn a new language, not as long as you are willing to.  

3. Not willing to make compromises – While aiming for similar positions or higher you run the risk to shot yourself off from some of the greatest learning experiences

I think a very common mistake among many expats is that they start off with very high standards, which in itself would not be a problem, as long as those standards are realistic and achievable. I don’t want to sound discouraging but you might wake up one day realizing that you need to start everything all over because your skills are no longer up-to-date. You have two alternatives. Either you look at it as the end of an era or you try and see it as the beginning of a new journey. It all comes down to mindset after all. I remember being so determined to find a teaching position that I could not even consider anything else. I was putting so much pressure on myself, while trying to fight frustration, anger, low self-esteem, self-pity and the list could go on. The problem with most of us is that we prevent ourselves from living a full life because we constantly judge ourselves through the eyes of other people. You need to be your own measure.

When I started the internship in the kindergarten, I was over the moon because after years of constant battle I finally managed to get into a most competitive system, I managed to crack a tiny little hole in the thick wall but I also could not help thinking that in terms of career goals, if I may use these big words, I would not be making any significant improvement. It turned out to be the dumbest assumption ever. These couple of months have proved to be incredibly rich in new experiences, it has been truly an amazing learning period and I am grateful that I had the opportunity to do this along someone with a lot of experience and dedication. Never assume that what you know is good enough. Be open to new horizons.

4. Making assumptions and having far-fetched expectations – You cannot assume to think and most importantly to feel instead of other people

Making assumptions is the worst thing you can do, especially if you are someone like me, with a very vivid imagination. You can end up building all sorts of intricate narratives that have no connection whatsoever with the immediate reality and you will most definitely end up complicating your life. Taking assumptions to the next level will lead to overthinking, which  can be a huge block in the way of success not to mention that is takes its toll on your overall well-being. Making assumptions about someone, unless you know that person well enough, it is most certainly a complete waste of time. We all come from different backgrounds, with different sets of values, with different expectations and most importantly with pretty huge differences in terms of emotional intelligence. 

The best solution in order to avoid these kinds of futile self-tormenting sessions is to avoid those people whom you cannot resonate with. Surround yourself with individuals whom you can learn something from, who are able to motivate you and who are better than you. If you are lucky to be near such people you will see that they all have one thing in common, they all have a very sharp sense of reality and they always speak their mind. They never wear masks, because they need not to. You might find their opinion a bit harsh now and again but when you do, you are sure to have found the right person. Envy, malice or pettiness are strange from these people. No, they are not perfect, they just learned to deal with their imperfections and they are willing to share, to care and to empower. Cherish them and keep them close to you.

5. Not being able to give yourself a break – Searching for a job is a job in itself

Searching for a job is a 24-hour shift and if you put too much pressure on yourself it will eventually take its toll on your physical and mental health, believe me. You need to cut yourself some slack and just relax a little bit.

While making all these mistakes try not to forget that there is always a half full part of the glass. There is little or scarce improvement without mistakes. While making mistakes, you are  building your resilience, an essential quality we keep ignoring most of the time. While making mistakes you are facing new challenges and building new skills, you are upgrading yourself. It is a winding road but as long as you are willing to keep moving on you will never fail. At the end of the day, the best part is that you will meet people along this road, who will help you grow and become a better version of yourself.

 

• assumptions
• expat
• expectations
• learning experiences
• learning the language
• mistakes
• relaxation
• resilience
• volunteer
• volunteering