The earliest memory I have of feeling inadequate physically and “too big” goes back to when I was 5. My gran, whom I hardly ever saw because we lived in Africa at the time, was telling my Mum that I was a bit too chubby for my age. As I continued to get older, such comments continued to come from the adults in my life. They were deeply hurtful. They created and deepened the limiting belief that I was not enough. That I didn’t measure up to what I should be: slimmer.
As a result, I’ve hated parts of my body for most of my life. As a child I didn’t understand why I had to change. I just wanted to be loved exactly as I was. I was loved, but encouraged to “make an effort”, “exercise more”, “try this diet”.
Unfortunately, I continued to view myself through this lens as I became a young woman and an adult. I brought this limiting belief into my marriage, (mis)interpreting some of the things my husband said or didn’t say. It was a vicious circle.
In 2016, having gone through two bouts of postnatal depression, suffering from chronic anxiety and very low self-esteem, I came across a training that teaches empowering tools using the mind and body connection to improve happiness, health, and wellbeing. I was so desperate to get my life back and to feel “normal” that I went on this three-day training course.
It completely changed my life. Gone was the depression. Gone was the anxiety. I now understood that the comments coming from adults in my life were not meant to harm, in fact these adults meant well. I was able to forgive and forget. My self-esteem and self-love have slowly improved, but it took longer and more NLP-based tools to get where I am today: I love most of my body. I am grateful for my body and everything it has done and still does for me. I am uniquely and beautifully made, just as everyone is.
The photoshoot with Zori of Zori Art Photography was the next step on my journey to self-love. MY DREAM IS THAT EVERY WOMAN WILL LOVE HERSELF JUST AS SHE IS without caring what anyone else says. And I want to say that it’s possible!
Following the photoshoot, which was a deeply moving time, I have been able to look at the photos and see not only a beautiful woman on the inside, but a beautiful woman on the outside (however I can guarantee I don’t look like that every day).A few weeks later I wrote a poem inspired by the quote I chose to go with my photo at the exhibition, which was “What if I fall? Oh but my darling, what if you fly?” by Erin Hanson.
Here it is, published for the first time. A gift for you who may not feel you are enough today:
What if I fall?
Oh but my darling,
What if you fly?
What if I can’t?
Oh but my darling,
What if you CAN?
What if I cry?
Oh but my darling,
What if you LAUGH?
What if I get it wrong?
Oh but my darling,
What if you get it RIGHT?
What if I stumble?
Oh but my darling,
What if you WALK TALL?
What if they don’t like me?
Oh but my darling,
What if you are LOVED?
What if it hurts?
Oh but my darling,
What if you GROW from it?
What if I’m not enough?
Oh but my darling,
You are ALREADY ENOUGH.
What if…
Oh my very DEAREST,
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
About Ann Granchamp:
Ann is an accomplished NLP Master Practitioner and Lightning Process® Practitioner. To learn more about the 3 day training that saved her life and that she now teaches to others, please her website (https://ag-lifecoach.com/en/the-lightning-process-training/). You can also follow her on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/anngrandchampnlplifecoaching/) or Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/anngrandchamplifecoach/) for
About the photographer:
Zornitsa Ivanova, of Bulgarian descent, specializes in magazine and glamor portraits for everyday women, offering them an unforgettable experience for an afternoon, where every woman is the star.https://zoriart.com/ing them an unforgettable experience for an afternoon, where every woman is the star.https://zoriart.com/